Hungary for fun
Hungary's capital is literally a city of two halves. Buda on the west bank of the Danube is hilly and medieval, Pest on the east bank is flat and more modern. Buda seems to be the calmer, sensible side while the aptly named Pest is the more loud and brash one. It also turned out that the weather was to be just as schizophrenic.
We were here to meet up with two friends of ours who had flown out from the UK to join us for a few days.
We started by exploring the Buda side on the hottest and sweatiest day ever. We got the funicular up the steep cliff to Castle Hill, just to be a bit nearer the sun, and traipsed around the medieval castle district like lost legionnaires in the desert. We visited the castle itself, the stunning Matthias Church with it's toy town roof and the Fishermen's Bastion with its gr
eat views down on to Chain Bridge, the improbably grand Parliament building and the rest of Pesty side. We also discovered a statue of an army general whose horse, just like David Beckham, had a couple of golden orbs between its legs. I don't know if they bring you luck or not but there seemed to be a steady stream of people willing to clamber up the statue and clutch them for a photo. Claire included.
The only place to escape the heat was in "The Labyrinth", a maze of ancient tunnels under Castle Hill. They were, for centuries, variously used as prehistoric dwellings, medieval food stores, torture chambers, a prison, wine cellars, bomb shelters and wartime hospital. Now they have all been tarted up as a tourist attraction. But, because there isn't much to see down there apart from
tunnel after tunnel, they've just made some stuff up. There are faux statues and ruins, badly faked cave paintings, completely invented legends, some new-age mumbo jumbo and, as a finale, some made up "ancient relics". It took us a little while to work out that the "greatest archeological find from 200m BC" and the bits of concrete with a trainer print or mobile phone impression in it were part of some art installation commenting on consumerism. It was all a bit surreal – but not in a good way. The guestbook was full of angry comments about the pointless nonsense. Especially after we'd been at it.
Dazed and confused, we crossed back over the Chain Bridge to Pest and sought out a suitable watering hole. It was there that the hot, sweaty day turned into the stormy, rain-soaked evening. Cowering outside under the bar's parasols we enjoyed a lot of different cocktails from the menu while the rain did its best to top them all up. I'm not sure if, because we'd been there so long, they just started making them up in the end – Claire got one with a bottle of coke stuck in the top! Some time after midnight we were asked to settle up and leave but that only left us with the problem of where to go next. The only place nearby that was still serving drinks was a casino that had a dress code that specifically banned flip-flops, shorts and vest-tops… guess what
we were wearing. Somehow, using my James Bond-like charm and suave banter I managed to talk them into letting us in (I think they were quiet that night). Once inside we were blinded by the hundreds of flashing machines all vying for our cash. We tried to get a drink but they would only bring you a drink if you were playing a game BUT (and here's where we really came into our own) the drinks were FREE if you were playing. We huddled around the lowest stake roulette table and slowly eked our money out while ordering drink after drink. I thought I'd been clever in only staking as much as a drink would cost but one of our friends, surrounded by half a dozen vodka and tonics, did even better by actually winning 10,000 forint without really knowing what she was doing.
The Parliament, the castle and a few other key buildings all get lit up at night which gives the city a magical, fairytale look. We admired this as we were driven home, trying to remember the name of our campsite for an increasingly impatient cabbie.
The next day, surprisingly hungover, we managed to drag ourselves out of the van and this time explored the Pest side of town. One of the highlights was the magnificent St Stephen's
Basilica. Now, Budapest is literally infatuated with King, now Saint, Stephen. There are squares, roads, hospitals and any number of other institutions named after him, not to mention all the statues. However, even we were surprised to find his mummified right hand on display in the Basilica. You'd think they'd leave the poor chap alone.
After our friends had flown home, we went for a relaxing visit to the unpronounceable Szechenyi Gyogyfurdo thermal spa and baths situated in City Park just beyond Heroes' Square. Here you can enjoy, along with assorted locals and bemused tourists, a wallow in the many pools of many varying temperatures. We were given the choice of a locker or a "cabin" to leave our belongings in. We opted for the "cabin". Now the reason I keep putting that word in inverted commas is because w
hat they describe as a "cabin" is no bigger than a phone box. On top of that the door opens inwards so once you're inside it becomes very difficult the close. We were also given "towels". Note again the inverted commas. For "towels" read bed sheet. The one liberating element to the place was that nobody seems in the slightest bit body conscious. There were hairy people, lumpy people, thin people, fat people (Hungary Hippos as we called them), all bobbing around and all filling out a dazzling variety of swimwear. Who knew lycra could stretch that far? There were also some old chaps playing chess as they shrivelled up in the hot water. I tried a 40° pool but after about a minute I felt and looked like a lobster that had been dr
opped in the cooking pot.
As we left Budapest on our last day, we called in at Memento Park on Budapest's outskirts. This is a bizarre but brilliant collection of all the Communist statues that have been pulled down over the last couple of decades. As each one was toppled or earmarked for removal, they were shipped out to Memento Park and displayed in this sort of graveyard for Communism. It's a great idea, a great place to see and a great way to say farewell to Budapest.
We were here to meet up with two friends of ours who had flown out from the UK to join us for a few days.
We started by exploring the Buda side on the hottest and sweatiest day ever. We got the funicular up the steep cliff to Castle Hill, just to be a bit nearer the sun, and traipsed around the medieval castle district like lost legionnaires in the desert. We visited the castle itself, the stunning Matthias Church with it's toy town roof and the Fishermen's Bastion with its gr
eat views down on to Chain Bridge, the improbably grand Parliament building and the rest of Pesty side. We also discovered a statue of an army general whose horse, just like David Beckham, had a couple of golden orbs between its legs. I don't know if they bring you luck or not but there seemed to be a steady stream of people willing to clamber up the statue and clutch them for a photo. Claire included. The only place to escape the heat was in "The Labyrinth", a maze of ancient tunnels under Castle Hill. They were, for centuries, variously used as prehistoric dwellings, medieval food stores, torture chambers, a prison, wine cellars, bomb shelters and wartime hospital. Now they have all been tarted up as a tourist attraction. But, because there isn't much to see down there apart from
tunnel after tunnel, they've just made some stuff up. There are faux statues and ruins, badly faked cave paintings, completely invented legends, some new-age mumbo jumbo and, as a finale, some made up "ancient relics". It took us a little while to work out that the "greatest archeological find from 200m BC" and the bits of concrete with a trainer print or mobile phone impression in it were part of some art installation commenting on consumerism. It was all a bit surreal – but not in a good way. The guestbook was full of angry comments about the pointless nonsense. Especially after we'd been at it. Dazed and confused, we crossed back over the Chain Bridge to Pest and sought out a suitable watering hole. It was there that the hot, sweaty day turned into the stormy, rain-soaked evening. Cowering outside under the bar's parasols we enjoyed a lot of different cocktails from the menu while the rain did its best to top them all up. I'm not sure if, because we'd been there so long, they just started making them up in the end – Claire got one with a bottle of coke stuck in the top! Some time after midnight we were asked to settle up and leave but that only left us with the problem of where to go next. The only place nearby that was still serving drinks was a casino that had a dress code that specifically banned flip-flops, shorts and vest-tops… guess what
we were wearing. Somehow, using my James Bond-like charm and suave banter I managed to talk them into letting us in (I think they were quiet that night). Once inside we were blinded by the hundreds of flashing machines all vying for our cash. We tried to get a drink but they would only bring you a drink if you were playing a game BUT (and here's where we really came into our own) the drinks were FREE if you were playing. We huddled around the lowest stake roulette table and slowly eked our money out while ordering drink after drink. I thought I'd been clever in only staking as much as a drink would cost but one of our friends, surrounded by half a dozen vodka and tonics, did even better by actually winning 10,000 forint without really knowing what she was doing.
The Parliament, the castle and a few other key buildings all get lit up at night which gives the city a magical, fairytale look. We admired this as we were driven home, trying to remember the name of our campsite for an increasingly impatient cabbie.
The next day, surprisingly hungover, we managed to drag ourselves out of the van and this time explored the Pest side of town. One of the highlights was the magnificent St Stephen's
Basilica. Now, Budapest is literally infatuated with King, now Saint, Stephen. There are squares, roads, hospitals and any number of other institutions named after him, not to mention all the statues. However, even we were surprised to find his mummified right hand on display in the Basilica. You'd think they'd leave the poor chap alone. After our friends had flown home, we went for a relaxing visit to the unpronounceable Szechenyi Gyogyfurdo thermal spa and baths situated in City Park just beyond Heroes' Square. Here you can enjoy, along with assorted locals and bemused tourists, a wallow in the many pools of many varying temperatures. We were given the choice of a locker or a "cabin" to leave our belongings in. We opted for the "cabin". Now the reason I keep putting that word in inverted commas is because w
hat they describe as a "cabin" is no bigger than a phone box. On top of that the door opens inwards so once you're inside it becomes very difficult the close. We were also given "towels". Note again the inverted commas. For "towels" read bed sheet. The one liberating element to the place was that nobody seems in the slightest bit body conscious. There were hairy people, lumpy people, thin people, fat people (Hungary Hippos as we called them), all bobbing around and all filling out a dazzling variety of swimwear. Who knew lycra could stretch that far? There were also some old chaps playing chess as they shrivelled up in the hot water. I tried a 40° pool but after about a minute I felt and looked like a lobster that had been dr
opped in the cooking pot. As we left Budapest on our last day, we called in at Memento Park on Budapest's outskirts. This is a bizarre but brilliant collection of all the Communist statues that have been pulled down over the last couple of decades. As each one was toppled or earmarked for removal, they were shipped out to Memento Park and displayed in this sort of graveyard for Communism. It's a great idea, a great place to see and a great way to say farewell to Budapest.
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